When My Head Hangs Low

“The Lord upholds all those who fall and lifts up all who are bowed down.”  – Psalm 145:14

There was a time when I walked most days with my head held low. My eyes seeing the world only from my empty heart on down.

Worry and fear hung around my neck like a millstone. The oppressive weight of my sorrows and burdens caused my gaze to fall earthward and inward. My molehills became mountains, and life was difficult.

I didn’t dare look up for fear I’d catch someone’s eye. I was afraid of connection, for I had nothing left to give. A smile and a simple hello held too much effort.

Those days still come around sometimes.

I walk, and sit, and move with my eyes aimed at my feet; much like I did then. Closing myself in to do battle once again with a relentless foe called depression.

I am grateful to God for letting these times slip by at a quicker pace than they once did. I have grown in faith over the years, because I’m learning to trust Him. In doing so, my stubborn walls are more easily pierced with His strength and hope.

But there are times when the rush of sorrow overwhelms and my eyes fall – forgetting victory, forgetting hope, forgetting God.

Memory of what He’s done – salvation, refinement, and change are eclipsed by sadness. I sigh in guilty shame. How long does it take me to forget who I am; to Whom I belong?

Not long at all.

So in my weakness, I’ve armed myself with a trinket. A toe ring bearing three crosses.

photo: Raye Wortel

photo: Raye Wortel

When I’m bowed down, the ring reminds me…

  • When my head hangs low, I remember Jesus died to set me free.

  • When I bow my head in shame, I see those crosses and remember I have a choice. I can scorn Jesus in my troubles as one thief did, or I can acknowledge him, and hold on to the certainty that Paradise is my home.

  • When I hang my head in fear and doubt, I remember through Christ I’m more than a conqueror.

  • When depression pulls me inward and downward, I’m reminded of His incomparably great hope which binds me to Heaven.

  • And when my head lowers in dismay or frustration, I’m reminded to change my judgements and criticisms, and instead, praise God for His sovereignty.

My toe ring is a trinket, not an idol. A spiritual marker to remind me of God’s deliverance, liberation and hope.

It reminds me to lift my eyes heavenward and proclaim:

“To you I lift up my eyes,
O you who are enthroned in the heavens!” (Psalm 123:1)

What spiritual markers have you in your life? What do you do to remind yourself of God’s goodness?

3 Replies

  1. Herlinda

    Thank you. I have a Cross on a necklace. I reach for it often. It reminds me of God’s sacrifice for us and his love for us. When things close in, when thoughts are Dark, I reach for it and say a Prayer. Thank your for your Postds…

  2. Karen Uribe

    I love this!!! May have to purchase me a reminder of some sort to display on my toe 🙂

    1. Raye Wortel

      Yes! Thanks so much Karen!

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