Those Flippin Voices in Our Heads! (Three ways to handle them)

“…be transformed by the renewing of your mind.”  Romans 12:2  NIV

Photo: Renae Bowman

Photo: Renae Bowman

For as long as I can remember there have been two sets of silent voices. Yet, one side always seemed to win out.

You’re not smart enough.
You’re not able enough.
You’re not good enough.
And the appearance ones, too:
You’re not thin enough.
You’re not pretty enough
And so on.

Maybe you have your own list of You’re not _________enoughs, too.

They’re the voices that drown out the reasoning of the others; the words that are given quasi truth though they are born out of lies.

It seems a common theme in so many of our lives, doesn’t it? Sit and talk with a friend and sooner than later the not enough’s will come out. The list can grow long. The list can grow quickly.

From childhood those voices were learned—who knows their origin—but they were there in the generalities of life.
However, somewhere along the way the generalities turned specific.
Differences became defining.
Defining became deafening.

The you’re not (fill in) enough turned into simply, you’re not enough.

You’re not enough of a daughter (If only I was a son he wanted)
You’re not enough of a friend (I don’t fit into the group)
You’re not enough of a wife (He chose divorce)
You’re not enough of a woman (Children can’t come)
You’re not enough.

Those voices stacked up proverbial bricks so high that a wall was created to not only keep everything out, but to keep everything in. Pain has a way of doing that.

Enter Jesus. Enter a new life. Enter joy.

The ending of the voices? Not hardly!

They didn’t go away. They just changed their tune.

Why would God love me?
Why would God even like me?
Your past!
Your now!
Your sins!
Your weaknesses!

There they were, in-between the Bible studies and worship songs and hand raising and handholding. I knew the Word said I was enough, but the voices said I wasn’t.

Oh friends, I’m writing this because I know some of you have been there, too. Some of you are there right now. I’ve heard your stories. I was there again, too–not too long ago. I know it’s a thing so many of us struggle with. I know how easy it is to question your worth in the eyes of God.

It’s those flippin voices in our heads!

It’s those voices that say in one minute I am a child of God, and in the next, how unworthy we are. They are the voices that energize in times of greatness but deplete in times of despair. They are the voices that tell us we can get through anything, and in the next tell us we will be defeated. They flip and they flop constantly.

Through tears and trials I have come to understand three must dos when this happens:

1. —Ask yourself, are these words from God or are they the same old insults of your making. It’s a hard question, but it must start here.

There is a way to absolutely know the answer to this.
If they are from God…
He wouldn’t tell you you’re less than. (You’re more than you’ll know.)
He wouldn’t tell you, you don’t measure up. (His standards are true)
He wouldn’t tell you you’re worthless. (Your value is rooted in love)
He wouldn’t tell you you’re not enough. (Your past doesn’t make your future)

2. —If the voices are of your own making…turn them down.

I’m a realist; I know they won’t ever go away, but I’m learning we have the ability to quiet the noise. We have the power to drown them out. We have the power to turn up the Truth and turn down the lies. It’s a deliberate act. It’s a decision we have to make. The power we have has a name–the Holy Spirit. He answers when we call. His strength makes it happen! It’s up to us to call out for the help.

3. —Get a second opinion.

Ask someone else. Seek that someone who is rooted in God’s Word, someone whom you can trust in Jesus, and tell them your doubts. Pray for vulnerability and share your heart. For when you do, the likelihood of clarity will begin to happen.  Another’s words may be just what you need to realize the voices you’ve been listening to have been the wrong ones.

And when you’re done with all three—rinse and repeat, as they say. Do it as often as needed to overcome the doubts in order to prevail in the certainty.

God doesn’t operate in the realm of shaming and demeaning. He doesn’t encourage doubt. If you’re in a mental battle right now, if you’re working out a problem, if you’re questioning your role in it all, seek God’s voice over yours. Flip the lies. Flip the deception. Turn down the destruction and turn up the building truths.


4 Replies

  1. Mimi Bradford

    Thank you.. It seems like I always need to be reminded to turn off the voices

    1. You and me both, Mimi! blessings.

  2. Karen Uribe

    This is awesome. And for me great timing as I am traveling down the road, once again to losing weight. There is nothing wrong with wanting to be healthier but I have to remember He loves me as I am, that is comforting 🙂 Thanks Renae!

    1. Hi Karen! Yes, it seems when we deal with weight loss and changes of the sort those voices really pop up. Rest in the fact that He won’t condemn. Although the voices will always pop up, lets commit to checking them against God’s heart first even while we’re dealing with motivation. Thanks for stopping by and chatting–we love to hear from you guys!!

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