Depression & The Light of God

“You, O LORD, keep my lamp burning; my God turns my darkness into light.” ~ Psalm 18:28 NIV

photo: Raye Wortel

Recently, I awoke to a darkness that had come upon me like a cold fog.  The feeling of simple happiness was gone, and the familiar gray I had lived with for more than 10 years had returned with a subtle vengeance.


I desperately wanted to be rid of it.  To keep the door to my mind closed so it couldn’t take hold, turning everything into futile and meaningless motion.


Depression has the power to strip courage.  Feeling powerless, the days roll into years, and before you know it, you forget what “alive” means.


I’ve been here before, but I now know a Strength that can turn my darkness into light.


This time would be different.  This time I knew Whom to call upon.


God is never associated with darkness.  He is light, and whether it’s to light a path for our feet, or to treat our disobedience with a devouring fire, God uses light as a beacon to draw us to him.


Have you ever noticed how a flame defies gravity?


Fire spreads across an area, but flames always dance and stretch heavenward.


A flame is also captivating.  When eyes are fixed upon a flame, it takes you in, and it’s hard to look away, like being drawn by an unseen power.  You’re aware of the dominance it can wield, but amazingly, peace is found there too.


No matter how bleak and dark life seems, there is still light in you.


Joy may be hard fought, and sadness may win the battle, but the flame you possess as Christ’s child, no matter the size, is more than enough for him to turn into a roaring fire.


A fire of freedom from the darkness or whatever binds you.

8 Replies

  1. Karin

    Dear Raye,
    I love your comment that depression strips courage. No truer words were spoken. When I’m at my bottom all hope and courage are gone. That is not what God wants for me but the dark one loves when we’re in that place. He dreams for that opportunity, I refuse to give it to him!

    1. Karin, you are one of the bravest women I have ever known, and I admire your determination to rise to what God has for you. Give in to the Lord – the giver of LIGHT!

  2. Lori Perez

    Thank you Raye for writing about this. My son had surgery a week ago Friday and lately he has been depressed. Every time he gets down I have him open his Bible and read the wonderful words that are from our Lord. I especially have him read Psalms. there are so many passages to read in Psalms that can truly light the fire that you need to hear the promises of our Lord. God Bless you and have a great week.

    1. Oh, I hope your son feels better soon! The Psalms are so wonderful for lifting one’s spirits. I love the Psalmist’s vulnerabilities, and the rawness of emotions are so relatable. Thank you for sharing!

  3. Devery

    ….and all it took was remembering! Praise Him, for when we are weak, He is strong.

    1. Praise him, indeed! Good to hear from you Devery!

  4. Diane

    Oh how I know that cloud and how greatful I am that when I call upon the Lord of Hosts, HE turns my darkness into light, and draws the countance of joy upon my face. He is faithful if I only cry out. . .thank you for the reminder and leading us out of the despair of hopelessness with your shout of joy! HE is good!

    1. Good morning Diane, thank you for your great comment! God is definitely good!!

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